And now, for the benefit of the Rockneite Marxists of the Golden Domed Shrine of the Holy Whapping, we take you to the office of Professor Wagstaff at Huxley College:

Wagstaff: (Cracking walnuts with the telephone.) And I say to you gentlemen, this college is a failure. The trouble is, we're neglecting football for education.
Both professors: Exactly. The professor is right.
Wagstaff: Oh, I'm right am I? Well, I'm not right. I'm wrong. I just said that to test you. Now I know where I'm at. I'm dealing with a couple of snakes. What I meant to say was that there's too much football and not enough education.
Both professors: That's what I think.
Wagstaff: Oh, you do, do you? Well you're wrong again! If there was a snake here, I'd apologize. Where would this college be without football? Have we got a stadium?
Professor One: Yes.
Wagstaff: Have we got a college?
Professor One: Yes.
Wagstaff: Well, we can't support both. Tomorrow we start tearing down the college.
Both professors: But professor! Where will the students sleep?
Wagstaff: Where they always sleep. In the classroom.

For more of this sort of thing, visit Marx-Brothers.org and Why a Duck?